happiest place on earth...and in hell

so last night nellie and i went to disneyland. we try to limit our 'happiness' to 2 rides each time we go to disneyland. we try to do two different rides so that we will get through them all by the time our season passes expire in february. last night we did a repeat of space mountain, but we did get to two new rides: 'mr. toads wild ride' and 'pinocchio.'

so i dont know what exactly mr. toads wild ride is based on, but its a messed up ride. i thought it was based on the story 'the wind and the willows.' i dont really remember that story that well, but i remember seeing the cartoon when i was younger. all i really remember was that there was a toad and he got himself in to troubles and at the end he somehow escapes from rats or weasels. im not exactly sure. not that it really matters though because the ride is completely ridiculous and makes no sense.

in most of those storybook rides, there are voices or someone sort of narrarating as you go through the ride. there are no voices on mr. toads, so you are left to interpret the story on your own. you start by going in and out of a library. then through some sort of alley where there are weasels on the ceiling. then you weave around and head through the streets of london. you almost get into about 4 car accidents and there are explosives all over the place. at one point there is a bartender selling beer.  later, you find yourself weaving around some fountain and before you know it, some random judge is reaching over his bench and pointing a finger, presumably signaling that you are being sentenced, and your sentence is through the next door. what is through the next door? hell. it gets hot. literally a temperature increase.  there is fire all over. the room is full of a large devil and many small devils that are laughing and screaming all over the place. at least there is a happy ending right around the corner. oh wait, no there's not, when you leave that room, there are fake explosives and then the ride is over (btw, if you want to see it, there is a fair/poor youtube video of it). 

so technically, the ride ends in hell. which is fine by nellie and i. we are comfortable there and are able to laugh at the experience. but what about the children? nellie and i as adults couldnt even understand what was going on. but at least we were able to laugh about it and walk away unscathed and realize its just disney being crazy like they were with the pink elephants in dumbo. but a child? they just sit there silently, wide-eyed staring at all the craziness, soaking it all in. here is what they gather from that. there are scary, cigar smoking weasels in some city called london. stuff blows up for no reason. beer is good. and anytime an old person points a finger at me it means i have to go to the hot room with the scary, red-faced, horned man with all of his scary, pointy tailed rodents. no wonder children hate going to their grandparents house. and its all at the happiest place on earth. (note to reader: this in no way is some sort of blog post about how disneyland should shut down that ride. not at all. im not crying here and pleading for the children. i dont have any, so frankly i dont care about them...thats not entirely true. but im really not that worried about them and their response to this ride. if it were my kids, id let them go on. well, for sure if it was a niece or a nephew id let them go. im the worst uncle.)

we then went on pinocchio.  also traumatizing for children.  but at least in this one there are voices that are somewhat narrating and letting you know whats going on with the story.  which is good because children are turning into donkeys so somebody better be telling these little kids what the heck is going on.  going through hell is bad enough without being told why, but turning into a donkey without knowing the reason is worse.  anyways, the reason i bring up pinocchio is because rottentomatoes.com had it rated as the number 3 animated film of all time - number 1 being 'toy story 2.'  i love the toy story movies.  its amazing that a sequel is supposedly better than the original.  i dont dispute it.  the original is number 4 on the list.  both are just so good though.  they make me happy.  and so do their rides at disneyland. 

so at first i was surprised by pinocchio being so high on the list, but then while going on the ride, i realized that its actually a pretty powerful and amazing story with lots of great themes.  you have the always loyal conscience in jimmy cricket.  never leaves pinocchio's side.  always there and always trying to help him out; temptations from the real world; lying of course; second chances; of course there is the whole traumatizing part about the boys turning into donkeys.  and it is really freaky, but its also very powerful imagery of these boys getting caught up in temptations and then vile habits and addictions to the point where they are no longer able to choose for themselves and they are literally bound and taken captive and into slavery by this lifestyle; pinocchio narrowly escapes because his always faithful conscience barely bails him out; he gets in more trouble, but ultimately saves his father/creator that always loved him and never gave up on him.  

its a pretty remarkable tale.  it all made sense to me and i realized how great of a story it is when i was on the ride.  granted, seeing it so high on the list the day before made me wonder what other people saw in the show and then the ride reminded me of the many powerful themes from the story.  but again, just like 'mr. toads,' im an adult and im thinking and processing the themes of the story and the ride.  im getting a completely different experience than the children.  the children are just sitting wide-eyed thinking that they are going to hell and if they somehow escape that, they will just be turned into a donkey anyways.  such a happy place.